Online Dating: Men Over 50 Are Doing It Wrong

Recently, AARP dating expert Ken Solin dropped by Huffington Post to discuss the differences between men and women when it comes to online dating after the age of 50.

As the news site notes, more and more single people are using the Internet to create a love connection later in life, “but there’s a clear gender divide in how they adjust to dating online.”

According to Solin, older men who online-date “usually cast a much wider net than women.”

“Men tend to approach online dating like it’s a candy store and they’re a kid with a bag of dimes,” he said. “They just spin the dial, and you can tell … by the emails men send. ‘You’re cute, let’s talk’ — how many people did they send that to?”

Women approach the world of online dating in a more thoughtful manner, making more careful choices such as studying a potential match’s profile before breaking the ice. Women also tend to understand sex within the relationship in a much better way.

“It’s more difficult for men to understand that the best relationships — the hottest sexual relationships, passionate relationships — are also best friendships, and that’s critical,” he said. “We were raised to think that once you become friends with a woman, sex is over. Actually the opposite is true. Once you becomes friends with a woman you love, sex gets better.”

How can men change the way they approach online dating?

1. Spend more time reading profiles before sending messages. Men have a tendency to go on looks alone, feeling they can get a better sense of who the person is with an in-person meeting. However, online dating profiles are often detailed enough to give a man a good sense of whether the relationship will work out ahead of time. It’s much better to do the work and study the profile.

2. Think about what the most important things are that you’re looking for a late-in-life love connection, and then ask yourself if this person has it.

3. Pay attention to how a site gauges your similarities and interests. Use that to narrow down your search.

4. Aim for fewer dates and deeper connections.

Are you an over-50 man in the online dating world? What do you look for in a relationship?